I appreciate you're reaching out and being honest in telling me about what's going on with you. Not an easy thing to do. I will indeed pray for you, and I hope your HP gives you the strength to make it to a 12 step meeting, or to call someone in the program in your area. You are not alone.
hugs
Jessie D.
twinkie wrote:
Hey Jessie
Thanks for asking.Im so depro its so hard to be positive about anything.My wheels fell off huge!!!I went on a drug binge after being clean for so long and I cant find my way back to sobriety.Every day i tell myself this is it,just today,tomorrow il put my life back together.Is easy to say while you feel good but as soon as the withdrawal starts my good intentions go for a ball of ###! Then im at my dealer so fast its unbelievable,again saying,just today!I hate myself for my weakness,i cant stop thinking if my life is ever going to be okay again and most days i dont want on go on living.Im such a coward.I dont want to live and i dont want to die but i dont know how to pull myself together.Now im ranting when im sure you have your own issues to deal with without listening to my self pity!!! Im a complete wreck and know tomorrow is just going to be more of the same of today.please pray for me.
Thank you for your kindness and understanding. I have been down since this past Friday, (it's now Wednesday) but today I feel just a little more peaceful and hopeful, like I can see the light again. Thank God for faith.
hugs
Jessie
twinkie wrote:
Hey Jessie.Sorry you feeling so down.It is unfortunately part of the process but iv also been told its only in the early days and it does pass.I certainly hope so as i am also tearful on a daily basis but lets look to the future days of peace and happiness.Im still looking for a job as my addiction got in the way of my last one which i inevitably lost.Hope u have a brilliant day.huge hug.Zaine
Sounds like you are doing well, staying in the solution, instead of the problem. I am doing well, just for today. The weather here is odd as usual. It was about 40 degrees last night, and then about 80 degrees today. That's Michigan for ya! Glad to hear from ya, keep coming back
hugs
Jessie
twinkie wrote:
[quote="flowerchildofjc"]
Thank you for the welcome back note.Its been a tough couple of months bringing myself back to the path of recovery but im trying to keep a positive state of mind and hopefully wont backslide again.How are you doing?Whats the weather like there?Its cold and miserable in johannesburg at the moment.
I am doing well, just for today. The weather here is odd as usual. It was about 40 degrees last night, and then about 80 degrees today. That's Michigan for ya!
Glad to hear from ya, keep coming back
