practicing doing the right thing for my life today requires at times for me to not do what "I want" to do. i am finding myself wanting to distract myself at times but i know deep down that ultimately that does not serve it's purpose in my life anymore. to sit with the uncomfortableness and just feel the feelings that i am experiencing. yes, although uncomfortable there is a sense of peace inside. i sense that i am moving closer to the place where i am more in tune with Creator's will.
living alone, no cable, no pets, no children, no mate is at times lonely. i long for people to share my life with, yet it is in the stillness that i find i can be content, all that is in me today. i am okay just as i am right now sitting here as i type these words, knowing that when i do take the next right action, i get filled with all i need anyway.
as i walked through the day i saw how yes, i could be useful to another human being. at times you have taught me that all this requires me to do is listen. it requires that i hear what another person is saying and not just talk. andy used to say the greatest gift you can give somebody is your time. how true he is. i don't spend enough time with him, this i know. i don't know that i'm always really listening either when he is speaking to me. i drift from one thought to another...but there have been moments where i am directly in tune with the words and thoughts coming from Him. ultimately, i know he was put in my life for a reason. i don't think he will ever know just how much he has given me. i will never be able to give him even a fraction of what he has so freely given me.
