but I am alright.I have been having a good time for the last few weeks.I realized today that I usually write when things are going badly for me.That means that you all get my venting moments,not my peaceful times.My sense of fairness is offended by that,and I want you all to know that I am in a good space mentally,physically and emotionally.My marriage counsellor has my wife and I do a homework process called MAD,SAD,GLAD,SCARED,where we say,in order one of those things to each other.Like,I am mad that you did not wash the dishes,etc. I have been having a hard time with anything except the glad part lately.This does kind of worry me because I have a good track record of F***ing things up.I was talking last night at meeting about the difference between hope and expectations.I hope that I will be able to do the right things,but I expect that I will not.I  am working to not realize my expectations that way.I will continue to accept my path as it will be,not what I think it should be.

"God, I offer myself to Thee -- to build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of life. May I do Thy will always!"

This sounds like something easy enough to do.Nah,not so much.

For me it has been a big stopping point.For others,too or it would not get its own whole step.I thought,there is nothing new in the big book or the steps until I realized they do apply to me.I have nothing new to bring to them except myself.

Peace,Donovan