"We dreamed of finding a magic formula that would solve our ultimate problem -- ourselves"
Basic Text, page 4
I know that when I came to the twelve steps, that described my life in a nutshell. Back then I believed I was a monster and needed something to fix that. But what I wonder today is if I am still falling into that trap.
I found something online that described exactly what I wish was there for me:
"You told them what you wanted and they then defended you from yourself. It wasn't abnegation of responsibility; it was a conscious act of trust, of collaboration, of a well defined team being stronger than just the sum of its components. A safe context in which you were wanted, openly and honestly, to be yourself."
Sometimes I feel like I need someone to be there when I'm getting out there, someone who can say "No, you can't cross this line." But I am an adult, so I should be able to do that for myself. But I can't seem to, or I don't seem to. I become passive and hide or just stop acting. If there's no consequences nothing changes.
