Well, after a good day...
I slipped back a little. I refrained form getting drunk but I caved in last night. I had a heated conversation with my Mum about my 16y/o's behaviour while she was with her. It brought up some past hidden emotions form my teenage years. I began to feel low, my thoughts started focusing on the pain I have caused and I slipped..
I had a choice this morning to look at this negatively or positively... I chose the positive.
I immediately felt the depressing effects and not long after burst into tears. It was my inner child form my teenage years letting out the anguish I felt regarding my Mothers actions when I was younger, So I let him...
I began to dwell on my lost love. I remained strong and sent no messages. I used to be so good at sending them when I was drunk, they were usually accusation or insulting.
I got rid of the remaining alcohol and didn't get drunk, a display of self control I didn't think I would have, but thanks to my HP's guidance... I'm getting there.
I have decided to stop all alcohol intake, rather than just not getting drunk. This experience has helped me to see recovery for me is all or nothing...
I decide to give it my all... One minute, one hour, one day at a time.