I got me a new box of crayons, so I figured that it might be fun to put a little grafitti up here. It's been an interesting month with a bit of excitement in my chosen profession, so that is really keeping me on my toes. My life here at home has had little for me to whine about, so I can't justify complaining about that. So what?
     I'm not even waiting for the other shoe to drop.
     I look at my life - yeah, it's nowhere near perfect, I still make some really dumb mistakes. People still piss me off through no fault of theirs, but by my often twisted perception. But the mistakes I correct as soon as I realize it and my attitude I adjust accordingly. So Why?
     I can only atttribute it to God, AA and you all. I responded to another's correspondence today by thanking them for being a part of my recovery. Why? I have found that working with others in person and in correspondence here has taught me so many hidden things about myself - things I would have never known if it wasn't for the soul searching to find a response that really meant something to both myself and another. I've been forced to dig into my own feelings and motivations for real understanding of those same things for others. I've learned a little about the many manifestations of our disease and a whole lot about the things we really have in common - rather than the few trivial differences.
     Short Story: I went back east for a week to see my father. Here is a man I hated from the time I was eight till I was in my thirties. In fact, there was a five year period where we had no contact at all. This was all corrected later, more through his efforts than mine. I went back there for a multitude of reasons, one was to make an amend. All those years I was out there, he never gave up on me. Whether I knew it or not, he kept track through others, waited and suffered patiently. The amend was made, but he responded with only gratitude for me coming to see him. That I could ever be such a gentleman.
     I could never have done this if it wasn't for the things I learned from you and others in recovery.
     The point of this litany of babble is put the gratitude where it belongs. Deep down inside I know that I would not be the me I am now if not for you. Each and every one of you is a big-time, major-league permanent part of my recovery. For that you have my everlasting gratitude.
Nuff said,
Dennis