When I first starrted in recovery, I had this dream of being "normal". Yeah - so I was wrong. If you can stop laughing, read on - while I rant a bit..
I've been working on our annual AA roundup this year, as being of service is supposed to part of the fellowship. Our committee is comprised of a very small percentage of the fellowship in our town. Working with these members (mostly of long standing - 15 plus years) has confirmed to me a sad fact of life. I do not want to be normal. I pray that I am never normal. If I become normal I hope someone puts me out of my misery - quickly. No fanfare, please.
One of the basic tenets of my recovery is alluded to by the phrase "Anonymity os the spiritual foundation of all our Traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities" - the twelfth Tradition of AA. At first glance it seems to say "be anonymous, don't be advertising yourself". In part that is true. Now lets add one of those principles to it - "Having had a spiritual awakening as a result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholice, and to practice these principles in all our affairs" - the twelfth step. That tacks on all 164 pages of principles and tenets,
IMHO, that means that the practice of humility and acceptance of others is to be a foremost consideration when dealing with people - whether in or out of the fellowship. Compromise, Studied and considerate discussion regarding differences of opinion and desires.
Nope - not a chance. These people are normal. Bickering, sniping, back biting, egos in collision. All in all, excellent examples of "normal" human beings. My God - I'd rather go on a field trip to Madam Tussade's wax museum with a group of eight year olds.
I am glad that I've been around the tables just long enough to realize that being "normal" is not a result I desire from this road I am traveling.
Maybe today will be better for them - but somehow I don't think so.
Me - I think I'll try to keep my opinion to myself. Life is too short as it is...
Nuff said,
Dennis
