Well, I have finally finished my first perusal of Mr Pietsch's book, "The Serenity Prayer Book", but it will not be my last. I really appreciate the fact that someone would write a book like this just for me. Who'da thunk?

     The last line "and Wisdom to know the difference" is the clincher. When I first got into this journey, I wasn't worried about serenity, All I cared about was staying somewhat sane while not drinking and eventually dying from it. Getting serenity is about those wierd dudes that sit out in front of caves or huts on mountain tops, chanting strange gibberish, right?

Well, maybe not quite.

     To have this "Wisdom" stuff requires me to have several things. Honest understanding of myself, some small understanding of all you people and a trust in God.

     I already know that I have no few flaws in my character, and have committed my share of transgressions. But if I am rigorously honest with myself - I will know my limitations (now there is a laundry list from h*ll). I will also be able to improve as time goes on - if I work on it.

     But you people - there is a real problem. If I trust everyone, I am going to look like a worn out punching bag. If I mistrust everyone, I will never be disappointed when I am let down - but I will never enjoy any personal relationships again. What is the best approach? Bill Pietsch says be optimistic about people and realistic about their flaws. 

     I can buy that, but what about this trusting God thing? This is where faith comes in. To keep it simple (simple is good for me), I have faith that God will do for me what I cannot do. There was a point in my recovery where all desire to drink was taken away. Believe me - I got faith by the truckload (you don't have to hit me more that twice with a 2x4 to get my attention). 

      But does one have to have an epiphany? Even before this wonderous occurrance I could sense?, feel? that certain coincidences and events were not "normal". I eventually figured out that God was providing that open door or event I needed (Duh...). I began to gain trust and confidence that He would do for me what I cannot do. That was the true beginning of my faith. The epiphany just caused it to solidify faster.

    There it is in a rather verbose, rambling nutshell. Honestly knowing my limits, realistic expectations of others and a unyielding trust in God. The neat thing about this is that as I grow, my limits change, my view of people changes and my trust in God increases. Thereby increasing my "Wisdom", so to speak. And along with it my "Serenity".

     Thanks for bearing with me on these blogs. There are times when I feel like a kid that just found a pretty marble and have to show it to everyone(just think - it could have been Tolstoy's "War and Peace").

Dennis

Tags: Serene