Step 4 - I make a searching and fearless moral
inventory of myself
Have you had any broken relationships? If so, describe them and
how they hurt others or yourself. Describe any grudges, anger or
resentment that you have over these relationships.
Have you ever felt self-righteous? Explain when and the circumstances. Was this justified? Elaborate.
What events or triggers have caused you to begin your addictive behaviors in the past? Describe situations, feelings, events, food or
people that you seem to be a part of your life just before or during
your addictive behaviors.
Have you ever held a grudge? Did you try to get revenge? If so, explain the situation and how it played out, including whether or
not someone else was hurt.
Describe times that you have been oversensitive. Did this ever damage your relationship with others, or were you just trying to
keep your own boundaries?
Describe the faults that you most detest in others. Do you have any of these traits yourself?
Put a checkmark beside any of the following traits that you despise in others. Also check whether you see these traits in yourself.
Traits that I Despise in Others
Trait
In Others
In
Myself
Trait
In Others
In
Myself
Selfishness Greedy
Cowardice Snobbish
Dishonesty Sarcastic
Fearfulness Hypercritical
Controlling Gossip
Manipulative Tightwad
Intimidating Harsh
Power-hungry Unforgiving
Possessive Verbally
abusive
Prejudiced Physically
abusive
Overly
dependent
Sexually
abusive
Procrastinating Impatient
Judgmental Adulterous
Preoccupied Sneakiness
Lying Ungrateful
Cheating Cynical
Intolerant Bitter
Self-Pitying Full of Rage
Jealous Envious
Insecure
Have you failed to do things that you KNOW that you should have done? If so, then explain in detail.
What are your fears? How have they caused you difficulty in your life?
Describe your relationship with your friends, co-workers or neighbors. Is there something that you wish that you could do over again? If so, explain in detail.
Describe your relationships with your family of origin. Do you have conflicts with any siblings or with your parents? Are you avoiding
these matters in your family?
Describe the earliest memories of your life. Did you share a similar personality with those in your family or were they very different
than you? Do you think that these similarities o differences caused
problems in your life? If so, explain.
If you were to describe your family's major themes, what would they be?
Describe your relationships with your nuclear family (spouse and children) if that is different now from your family of origin. Is there
anything that you wish that you could erase from this part of your
life?
Describe in detail any major experiences in your life that you believe changed your life forever afterwards (good or bad).
What decisions have you made in your life that made a significant impact on your life? How did you go about making those decisions?
How much of your life have you used up already? If you drew a
time line of your life, where would you be now?
Put your major experiences and major decisions on a timeline. Is
there a pattern of any kind?
What are you most ashamed of in your life?
Do you see any patterns in your addictive behaviors? If so, explain
them in detail.
What have you done to cover and conceal your addictive behaviors?
What other deceptions did this lead to?
What kind of personality do you exhibit at home? At school? At
work? When no-one is around?
What is so shameful in your life that you would not want to tell
anyone? Who would you hurt if you told this?
Write a summary of the highlights of your fourth step.
How would you like to share your fourth step summary? What
details would you like to make sure that are known? Write these
details down in your summary and prepare the summary for
presentation in your fifth step.
Describe anycelebrations or honoring activities that you hae done to honor the completion of your 4
th step.
