Well folks as you all can see it's been awhile. The holidays proved to be difficult and lonely. I found my way back to the bottle. I thought what the hell. Now I start my days with oh I'll start tomorrow. I ask that all who read this blog pray that I find sobriety soon.

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To the special people that reply to my blogs. I appreciate you.  Although I have made a year clean,, I have not been sold on the whole meeting and step working thing. I have been participating in outpatient treatment for a year. I do not doubt AA/NA, but the closer that I get to completing my outpatient the more I'm like ok now is the time to get into the meetings, sponsor, and stepwork because I think oh my gosh if I don't have treatment to go to what do I have. I know one thing for sure I cannot do this by myself. so question the very few meetings that I have gone to either there is alot of hooking up, or just not being able to connect. can you all offer me any tips/suggestions to get in the groove so to say. peace love and happiness

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It pains me to see an addict that knows their an addict has done or says she's done the step work, did inpatient as well as outpatient puts on that "everything is fine" front and then bam life throughs her a curve ball husband is diagnosed with stage three cancer and she starts drinking again, she got so bad he and his daughter are staying in a motel and he'll soon go to hospice. It hurts, but I know that I am in no position to help at this point all I can do is pray for her. What else is left. I ask that all those that read this to pray for her as well. I don't know why my heart aches at this point.can any one shed some light for me help me to understand.

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No one could have ever told me that this online stuff could touch emotions. but it did and does and I am glad that I came. Thank you to those who responded and your comments made me feel good. It tells me that this will be a great place to share my accomplishments and my F**k ups (lord knows I got em) this will be the place that will embrace and not jugde. Which today I have exactly 1 whole flippin year that i have been clean and sober the first of many more to come Can I get a HALE FREAKIN LUIHA. iT'S LIke recieveing a grammy or something I ,d like to thank my higherpower, i'd like to thank my mom I'm just kidding folks for real though its got me down on my knees crying a happy cry finally!!!!!!!!!!! AN EXHALE

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Hey folks ;looking for some friends

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Now what, what's next, is that it. I ask myself these questions. Especially on those friday nights.  I will have exactly one year of sobriety tomorrow!!!!!!!!!!! Though the struggle is as fresh as if it was only yesterday. I stumbled upon this website by mistake (or was it?) So here I am reaching out even farther than I ever have. I have very few folks in my support network, now is the time to expand any takers?

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