Well I am walking with a cane now, from wheel chair to walker to cane in about 2 weeks and 2 days from the crash.  It is amazing just how fast a clean and sober body can heal.  I have 3 fractures in my pelvis and I can walk with a cane. My regular meeting that I enjoy the most has stairs and I couldn't get up the stairs with a chair or walker. Last night I made it up the steps with a cane! It is also nice very nice to be off the oxy crap! The tramadol is non narcotic (thank god) the narcotic pain killers were really messing with me and brought up all kinds of really dangerous thinking. But for the grace of God I made it through that without spinning in addiction.    Miracles happen  Shyt Has to be made!     

5 comments View Entry

Hi everyone.

So I was riding my bike to go out for coffee from a late night meeting. With my head up my ass and my ego out of control I was racing down a curvy road and miss judged the corner. My front tire slid out on some gravel and I was thrown into a ditch with a rock retaining wall and then the bike hit me. Yes I was Riding the Triumph Sprint ST in the picture on my page and yes the bike is totaled.

I now have 3 fractures in my pelvis. I cannot walk, I am in a wheel chair. I will heal in somewhere between 6 weeks and 3 months. I will be walking and doing everything that people do with there pelvises . I am lucky to be alive and lucky all my personal parts still work just fine! I celebrated my 24 years clean and sober in the hospital doped up on pain meds, isn't that just wonderful. I am taking these meds as prescribed no more but sometimes less. I am going to meetings when I can get a ride. My life has just took another turn. A year ago my wife left, I lost my house, lost my job, so i moved to California. Lost my mind, Went to truck driving school and lost my money but made it through the school (DO NOT DRIVE FOR CR ENGLAND) The trucking company Phucked me over. oh ya had to give away my dog too. all I had left was my bike and now it is gone. I am now 24 years sober living at my parents house and in a wheelchair, single and jobless with no income.  So now I have to take these Oxycodone and Oxycontin. My how fast life can change   I felt my tolarence kick right in and now it does what it should kills the pain. It no longer gets me high and that is good and bad. the good part is I am not increasing the dose to get high. the bad part is I know that the physical addiction has me and I will have to withdrawl from these pain meds.  I tested it and let it lapse and got the shakes, nausea, sweats, and fever.  I will of course follow my doctors orders but this shyt really sucks!

5 comments View Entry

It is so nice to really be home! Back at the meetings in Portland I love!  Scullys, Back into the steps!   my family is here my baby girl is having a baby makeing me a grampa! I just need to find work get through this life. I went over the road Truck driving and went out of my mind in a bad way! I was unstable not working the steps not going to meetings and just trying to do things my way, well once agian my ass fell off and I am serious about my recovery. I have spent many years doing nothing in recovery and resting on my luarells (bad speller). Thank GOD this is a day at a time program and I don't need to hold up some long term sobriety image! I will be 24 years Clean & sober in 10 more days (god willing) and it is just 1 day at a time, that is all there is, today right now! I am now on a 4th step and have not done one for over ten years,,,,, guess I thought I was all better well I certainly am not better! Just another drunk just like any of you! my arigance (bad speller) has kicked my ass I sure hope I am done with that arrigant egotistical crap I have been feeding myself!

Time to be complete. Phuck this "my truth bullshyt!" How about the truth what really is now. The Truth is the Truth! If you think it is yours and can anyway be different then anothers then somone is not in truth! Probibly both of us!

2 comments View Entry