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Viewing 1 - 9 out of 18 Blogs.
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I just wanted to wish everyone a Happy Thanksgiving!! God Bless!
People don't understand how it can hurt to smile. Kill yourself to fit in, knowing you can't. Wanting to cut what you hate inside of you with only one way in. Wanting to die.
Being numb and not feeling any of the above.
That is what they miss in this disease.
Hey Everyone.....sorry I haven't posted anything or dropped any messages to anyone, went back to work and have been working 10 hour shifts. Hope all is well with everyone!!
*hugs*
Awesome news everyone, please pass it on!! Phobic made 1 YEAR of sobriety yesterday!! GO PHOBIC!!!
I know it has been a long time coming, and very hard for him...but I am very happy for him....and VERY PROUD OF HIM!!!
What does it really matter?
You spend every moment doing everything you can to make someone else happy. You sacrifice things you never thought you would, things that you swore you wouldn't, just to make someone else happy. Is it ever really worth giving everything you have to another, when in the end all they are going to do is take the best part of you and crush it! When all they are going to do is whatever makes them happy, totally oblivious to pain they are causing!!
I cannot even begin to describe how it feels to look into another's eyes, knowing they see the hurt and pain in yours, and they go about their day as if it doesn't matter. They say things, things that would probably seem innocent to another, and you just want to run out the door and keep running. They do things, that may seem innocent to another, all the while knowing and not caring that it hurts someone. When a person changes so much, in such a short time, and they are no longer the person you thought they were. Were they ever really that person to begin with? Or is it just something you wanted to see?
When you start becoming someone else, do things and act differently, in hopes that that person will notice you....love you. When you fight for every breath you take, when it's a struggle just to make it through the day, and it never matters in the end. The person you are fighting so hard for, is fighting for another, and no matter how hard you try...nothing ever changes. In the end, the harder you try, the harder you push that person away because in the end, you weren't what they really wanted anyways.
So I ask again....what does it really matter?
I am so tired of taking crap...just taking it and taking it and never saying a darn thing. I'm tired of the paranoid thoughts, I am tired of people coming to me and saying things that only make those thoughts worse, I am tired of being ignored and rejected.
First chance I have, I am out of here....
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Fallen
Posted On 08/03/2008 18:48:51
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Heaven bend to take my hand And lead me through the fire Be the long awaited answer To a long and painful fight
Truth be told I've tried my best But somewhere along the way I got caught up in all there was to offer And the cost was so much more than I could bear
Though I've tried, I've fallen... I have sunk so low I messed up Better I should know So don't come round here And tell me I told you so...
We all begin with good intent Love was raw and young We believed that we could change ourselves THe past could be undone But we carry on our backs the burden Time always reveals In the lonely light of morning In the wound that would not heal It's the bitter taste of losing everything That I've held so dear.
I've fallen... I have sunk so low I messed up Better I should know So don't come round here And tell me I told you so...
Heaven bend to take my hand Nowhere left to turn I'm lost to those I thought were friends To everyone I know Oh they turn their heads embarassed Pretend that they don't see But it's one missed step One slip before you know it And there doesn't seem a way to be redeemed
Though I've tried, I've fallen... I have sunk so low I messed up Better I should know So don't come round here And tell me I told you so...
Though I've tried, I've fallen... I have sunk so low I messed up Better I should know So don't come round here And tell me I told you so...
Though I've tried, I've fallen... I have sunk so low I messed up Better I should know So don't come round here And tell me I told you so...
Seems that Hubby and I are going to take a break. He has some issues that he needs to work out, that really dont have anything to do with me specifically. All I could do was tell him that I love him, that I always will....but I can honestly say that I never saw this coming. I don't know where I'm going from here, and if I'm gone for a bit, don't worry....
Thank you so much for all your help!! God Bless!!
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