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I am a 27 year old female. I currently live with my mother in Newton MA. Not sure what im doing and where i am.. and sometimes who i am. But I know some things and i know that i am a smart lady who is doing stupid things. All i want is help.. I am new to this whole thing and i believei want to get better. I will try to be positive.. and try my best..
I want to love myself because i must have hated myself so much to get myself to this point.
i try to be honest but obviously because i am an addict(and that's a hard thing for me to accept rightnow) I have lied about my substance use/abuse to the people i love. I know thats common but it doesnt change the fact that im ashamed and it makes me feel like a bad bad person for hurting them.
I am familiar with OA because im an overeater but depsite numerous tries it hasnt worked for me and i am afraid that NA will not work.
One of the reasons i fear it will not is that I still have a hard time with the first step concept...all parts of it .. espeically the higher power.
Also I was born and raised in Israel and been livig in the states for almost 13 years now.

Pesonality is everything to me. Openesss and listening is key. Be bright, kind, and loving.
Looks arent everything... im sure you know... cant judge a book by a cover... im all about that.
Education, nice eyes, a little craziness but to a point.. want a good heart. A guy that cooks and cleans and respects a woman.. some a

Pushyness, arrogance, rudeness.. hate them all..
jealousy, control, violence, anger.