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Viewing 19 - 27 out of 117 Blogs.
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Insanity? Restored to? I think we all go through rollercoaster rides. Even though I’ve been on the recovery journey for a while, things happen, we face stress, and even though we try to turn it over, a black cloud appears! This isn’t the first one I’ve had, nor will it be the last. I will use the tools given to me to get through today without using anything! A good reminder why we ask to be restored to sanity. While not generally certifiable, I do have my moments, and have to remember long and hard there is one who can and will restore me! A funny question came over the computer as I was in this dark spot, and I’m not sure I would have picked the “normal” answer! Try it on for size. Are You Insane? It doesn't hurt to take a hard look at you from time to time. This little test should get you started. During a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked the Director what the criteria is that defines a patient to be institutionalized. "Well," said the Director, "we fill up a bathtub. We offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient, and ask the patient to empty the bathtub." OK, here's your test: 1. Would you use the spoon? 2. Would you use the teacup? 3. Would you use the bucket? "Oh, I understand," said the visitor. "A normal person would choose the bucket as it is larger than the spoon." "No," answered the Director. ======== "A normal person would pull the plug." As I go through the day, I will keep this in mind, and call on my toolbox frequently. The beauty is that recovery has taught me “this too will pass”. A few moments of insanity? Yes. But it will be restored!!
Tags: Recovery Coach Transformation Spititual Purpose Www.hopeserenity.ca
Reflection and a Hard Head What a good weekend, but a great reminder that kids are for the young, and I don’t get smarter about some things with age. It was great to spend the time at my youngest daughters and in the company of a terrific son-in-law. All three of the grand kids were there, the oldest finishing off a weeks vacation with her cousins. Funny how different kids are with their parents not around! Some great learning and remember when’s! After 25 years on not ice skating, you are not a whirling dervish as you step on the ice. Not even ready for the senior Olympics. The good news, I made it around the ice several times without falling, and could skate better than my 6 year old grand son who has had two lessons in his life. From a practical stand point, that won’t last for long! I’m grateful for not inflicting harm on myself!! I was exposed to the computer guitar thing, Wii, and a few other things I don’t understand. I’m still not sure what some of this stuff is about, the guitar plays away and you “finger” buttons!! I love my computer for research and communicating, marvel at Skype, but don’t think I’ll ever get a love of games!! A generation thing? One year olds still cry at odd times of the night, and do interesting things with food! As well, with baby blue eyes and little fingers, they can get just about anything they want. How come they can respond to reasonably complex directions, like open the door and get into your car, but can’t speak?? One day the little doll will break into a multi-syllable paragraph and tell us how funny we are!! Who’s the bright one, the baby or the doting adults?? Got to spend some time with some friends, play 2 new golf courses, play a small course with the 2 oldest grand kids and my son-in-law, and just feel love. Also, stayed way from the computer! The bad thing with long weekends is that they end, and you come home to reality! Why does a man in Benin want to get me hooked up with bogus traveler’s cheques and wrap Christian salutations around it? When will I learn that if it looks too good to be true it likely is! Is it possible that we will have 36 hours without rain?? The trials of this world! I coached a couple of people today, and have a brand new client starting tomorrow! I’m looking forward to that and really enjoy watching my clients grow! Time is flying by! We are building a new house in another town, and there is some apprehension about that, a starting over, but I know all will be all right and no change comes without uncertainty! Things always work how they are meant to, and generally, without a lot of help from me! I skipped a meal today, and am starting to feel the chemical imbalance happen, and don’t feel that I got enough done. When did that weekend end? A softer head would have kept me off skates, and I would not have done some of the things I did today. On some items, I’m a slow learner with a hard head. But that’s why it’s a journey, not a destination!!
Tags: Recovery Life Coach Keith Trasformation Spititual Awakening Www.hopese
Live and Let Live A good reminder for me. I started on the journey to get a life back that had fullness, happiness, hope and serenity. I worked very hard at that process, have had a spiritual awakening, and benefited from the advice of professionals and peers who had walked before me. I wanted what I perceived many to have, a life filled with hope and serenity. A life in which I found my purpose; a life with purpose. My higher power has been very good to me, I am blessed. I am well on the way to the life I wanted, although goals have changed as progress occurred. I have to remind myself, I have been given a life to live. It is OK to live it every day to the fullest, free of my past. Others too have lives, and on a daily basis, I must remember they have the same right to live their lives in a way they see fit. I will offer suggestions when asked, but all have the right to make their own mistakes. I am constantly reminded god doesn’t require my help today, but I require help from the god of my understanding on a daily basis. May I spend today living, and may you also!
Tags: Addictions Recovery Coach Life Coach Transformation Spiritual Awakening
My Inside versus Your Outside What a great reminder I had today. This is something, without thinking about, I know I periodically do! How about you? They say you can’t judge a book by its cover, yet publishers spend a fortune to create great covers. As a person, for years, I did all I could to create a great exterior, and fell far short in effort on the interior. Today, I still try to take care of myself, dress appropriately, look after my hygiene and so on. I certainly spend far more time than ever did on things inside. By that I mean things spiritual, the source of life I found that lives within me; and I’m sure lives within each of us. When awakened, I found a source of strength within that I had shut out, so work on the inside is top priority. That being said, I periodically find myself comparing. There are many people I run into that look like they’ve really got it together. Their in great shape, they handle everything with apparent ease, nothing bothers them, they have the right clothes and “style”, and so it goes. We all meet them, and for me, there are times that I judge the book by its cover and say man, don’t I wish! Human nature. In the life I’ve had the privilege of leading, and the work I do now, I’ve had the distinct pleasure of meeting a lot of successful people, and famous people, on a fairly global basis. Some really do have their stuff together, and the inside is as good as, or in many cases, better than the outside. It is easy to genuinely admire, and more importantly respect. There are numerous luminaries I’ve met who were, on the inside, empty vessels. Scared, insecure and neurotic. Nothing to respect, all show and no go. Yet from a distance, I felt that I was less than. I think we all can relate to this. The inside is not what the outside looked to be. I certainly have had the experience of looking at the outside, and staying away. Then I’ve had the opportunity over time to get to know the person, and they are wonderful compassionate human beings. Yet in comparing my inside to their outside, I could have missed the richness of knowing them. Only I truly know my inside, and I try to keep it fit on a daily basis. I am wrong to compare who I am to people I meet. On my journey, my responsibility is to be comfortable in my own skin, and not compare me to “you”. As I’ve trudged the road to happy destiny, I have become comfortable with who I am on the inside. I have a set of principles I try to practice in all my affairs, and realize to that I have defects of character and will never be a candidate for a medal for perfection. My insides are OK, and I must learn to not compare to others exterior! Read the book Keith; read the book. We are heading into a long weekend here in Canada. I will be journaling in my book, but not in this forum for a few days. I know from the comments I get that some people read my ramblings regularly. This will be a weekend spent out of town with family. My grandson has learned to skate, and wants me to skate with him. That will be interesting! It will be good to just get away May the spirit within each of you grow on a daily basis, and love your inside, don’t compare what is the unique you to anyone’s outside! Quick thanks to my friend Igor who is redoing my website, www.hopeserenity.ca. It’s great to work with a highly creative young man and I look forward to the new product!!
Tags: Addiction Recovery Coach Life Coaching Life Purpopsewww.hopeserenity.ca
Ironic-A Thing on Friends/the Iron Lung I was talking yesterday with a mentee who was fresh off just another “binge”. He had an aha moment. After 10+ years around a 12 step fellowship, he discovered people he was meeting genuinely cared. It was a real revelation. Then this reading came through today: Since I have been in A.A., I have more friends than I ever had in my life - friends who care about me and my welfare, friends who don't care that I am black and that I have been in prison. All they care about is that I am a human being and that I want to stay sober. Since I've been home, I have been able to gain the respect of my two sons again. © 2001, AAWS, Inc., Alcoholics Anonymous, page 534 Along time ago, an old friend shared with me something that has stayed with me a lifetime and I think of and quote often. When thinking of another person I ask: If I were on the iron lung, would I want that person on the pump handle? (younger people-Google iron lung)”. If the answer is yes, then that is a true friend. I am blessed to have a few in my life!! On my journey of recovery, I’ve made several real friends, and the meetings I have attended have a disproportionate number of great people. Some real Friends have stuck with me from before journeys start until today. I have a balance, and I’m thankful. I try to be a good person, am outgoing and a networker. I have hundreds of “positive acquaintances” but only a few true friends. I must admit, there are people I meet at meetings I really don’t like, and I’m not everybody’s cup of tea. Yet if one person who shares the journey asks for help, it is my responsibility to be there. And I know others re there for me, like or dislike! I’m careful today about what a friend really is. I, like most, have had real disappointments with people I thought were friends. I’ve never had a lack of support from people on the shared journey. All must remember, no man is an island, but remember the iron lung too!!
Tags: Addictions Life Coach Recovery Spiritual Awakening Www.hopeserenity.caK
Humility or Humiliation? Where humility had formerly stood for a forced feeding on humble pie, it now begins to mean the nourishing ingredient which can give us serenity. Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, page 74 When I made a decision to take my life in a new direction, and reached out to get help, I was told I needed to be humble.Humble? My mind immediately raced and told me that to be humble, I would have to embarrass myself, and I’d had enough of that! I didn’t relate the inability to be humble, or lack there of, with things like being unable to accept a compliment with grace, having to make sure you knew who I know, and so one! I had accomplished much in my life, but could not accept that with humility. If you gave me a compliment, I couldn’t just say thank you. How often do I focus on my problems and frustrations? When I am having a "good day" these same problems shrink in importance and my preoccupation with them dwindles. Wouldn't it be better if I could find a key to unlock the "magic" of my "good days" for use on the woes of my "bad days"? I already have the solution! Instead of trying to run away from my pain and wish my problems away, I can pray for humility! Humility will heal the pain. Humility will take me out of myself. Humility that strength granted to me by that “power greater than myself is mine for the asking! Humility will bring balance back into my life. Humility will allow me to accept my humanness joyously. Today, I can enjoy my successes. Today, if I get a compliment, I can truly say a simple thank you. This massive change in my life is truly a gift, and a gift that is available to all!!
Tags: ADDICTION RECOVERY COACH LIFE'S PURPOSE
Why??-Do they. Another great question that came from a friend. If we replace the word alcohol with any of a hundred words, the question and response are every bit as relevant. Why does he behave like this? If hundreds of experiences have shown him that one drink means another debacle with all its attendant suffering and humiliation, why is it he takes that one drink? Why can't he stay on the water wagon? What has become of the common sense and will power that he still sometimes displays with respect to other matters? Perhaps there never will be a full answer to these questions. Opinions vary considerably as to why the alcoholic reacts differently from normal people. We are not sure why, once a certain point is reached, little can be done for him. We cannot answer the riddle. © 2001, AAWS, Inc., Alcoholics Anonymous, page 22 So have you pondered this question in your own life? For me, the solution came in working the steps and making new footprints in life. It was suggested that I work them as I become ready, that I be guided through them by someone who had walked before me, and that I worked them in order. The results I’ve experienced and witnessed tell me the advice was sound! People, who are basically sane, and usually intelligent, revert into “other” people when active in their addiction. We pondered the “whys” at a great meeting last week and thoughts like “too smart” and “not at Bottom” came forward. As stated above, the riddle has no answer. Why doesn’t matter, accepting what is and doing something positive about it does! There is hope for all who really want it! We welcome your questions. Denial is not a river in Egypt!!
Tags: Www.hopeserenity.calife Coaching Addiction Recovery Transformation Purp
A July Weekend- Validation Life, upon reflection, is always interesting. I have been blessed beyond anything I could have imagined, and only realize how much when I reflect on what has happened over a fairly short period of time, and how I was able to handle things and what I allowed myself to feel. Entering the weekend, I was really wondering how I (and many others) “get” a recovery program, and many very bright people stay away from their addiction for a while, and get right back to it. This was prompted by watching a couple of people go backwards in recovery last week. I know that being too smart and full of false pride get us in our own way, and keep us from getting the grace our higher power offers us. Friday night, I had the honour of being “best man” at my brothers wedding (a second wedding). As with many families where members end up on a recovery journal, our family was not one that would win a medal for good practice of mental hygiene. It functioned in its own way, but not with good head health! I certainly had some strong feelings about the wedding. Years ago I would have done some things that subtly sabotaged the event; in part to get attention. With the help of my higher power, I played my role, including MC at the reception, in a loving and proper fashion. For that I was grateful and knew my higher power had directed my conduct. Over the last couple of years, I have searched deeply for my purpose in life. I knew that there was a space I wanted to work in, a very narrow space, for the working days I had left. For 14 years I had felt inside that I wanted to work in a role where others may benefit, and that if I stayed in conscious contact with my higher power, I could be a conduit to others. Slowly but surely this is unfolding, and I am thankful that god has given me the patience to allow it to happen in his time. Over the weekend I had the privilege of taking part in a 5th step/footprint with a client in Europe. The wonders of technology allowed this to happen. It was interesting; upon reflection, to be fully there, to be able to listen and occasionally ask a question that triggered thought and release. One can never be sure of the outcome of work, only the other person truly knows if they have brought forth all that was hidden, but my sense is that both of us gained immeasurably from the experience. I certainly felt a strong sense of compassion for the things this person had experienced in the years that they were being shaped, and realize this person has the “disease” of addictions, and was put in a situation where initially addiction was a tool that allowed survival, then took over to be a tool of destruction! Many of us have lived that story. I am grateful to be able to be there for others, and understand what release they can gain on their journey. I was home alone all weekend, yet was able to remain in a good head space, reach out to others, take part in healthy social and physical activities, and grow just a little bit stronger. I even was able to willing spend some quality time one on one with my mother, who is institutionalized, and for whom I carried a resentment towards for decades! I am thankful to coach Gary Glasscock who helped me get over the remaining bit of resentment I held on to, and I am thrilled to be able to just “be there” for my mother as she completes her life. Those who know me know what a huge change this is in my life. Over the period of the weekend, I went through a range of emotions, allowed myself to feel them, and dealt with those feelings that were not positive ones in a healthy way. I was alone, but never alone, as I felt the presence of my higher power every time I sought conscious contact. I was of service to others and did some healthy things, and nothing that was destructive to others. This truly is a new life that has unfolded, and validates the message my higher power gave to me in the summer of 1994, and reinforces on a regular basis. There is a journey to a more abundant life available to all of us if we stay out of our own way, and are not “too smart” or prideful to accept it. I reflect on a weekend that at first blush was uneventful, yet was truly a miracle that came out of a journey to a new life! It is there for all who seek it!!
Tags: Recovery Of Life Fight Addictions Life Coaching
I Got An Unmerited Gift. Interested In One Too? By definition, unmerited means undeserved, and the gift I was given, the gift of life recovery-was seemingly undeserved. Why me? The question has no answer that I understand. For a long period of time, my life was in decline, some periods slow, some much more rapid and obvious to others. I was “too smart” to think anything was wrong. I was “too smart” to listen to the signals from others and away “too smart” to get help! My personal relationships were in decline, to make an understatement, I wasn’t feeling good about myself, my mood altering activities were not doing what they once had done and my job performance was not nearly as good as it could have been. But I was functioning and showing a face to the world that said “I’m Fine”. I wasn’t. While I have always tried to “give back” in my own way to things I was involved in, and was always there to help others, I know today while well intended, these things were part of the mask I wore. I wanted external validation that I was OK and liked. The unmerited gift came right out of the blue. I don’t know why me. To oversimplify, through a marital situation, I sought outside help. This help lead to another professional, to coaching and to therapy. It also lead to a support group. For some unknown reason it dawned on me, if I were that smart, why I had hit the lows that I hit. I chose to get out of my own way and try something new. I sought help, and I sought change. While addictions certainly played a role in my past, what I truly wanted was a life with hope, serenity, feeling feelings, loving unconditionally, and the laughter and restful sleep I knew others enjoyed. The gift had been waiting there for me for years. It is waiting for all who want it. To get it I had to get dumb, get out of my own way, and learn to trust. I have been fortunate to receive this unmerited gift, and it grows in its blissfulness everyday. I wondered out loud today about why so many I see who have hit a “low” just don’t get it even when it is offered to them. Wise people explained to me that most of them are “too smart” or too something to get it. If they’re lucky, they’ll dummy up and get it. I am grateful that I was chosen, on an unmerited basis, to get the gift of an abundant and rich life. It is there for all who need it. Are you interested in getting a gift??
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