Here I go.....
I have had a challenge with a sponsee over the last couple of days.
Someone I sponser I have found has been leading a double life of sorts.
She told me parts of her life that I have found to be untrue after she had recently been admitted to the psych ward of the hospital.  Very elaborate and detailed tragedies she has shared with me- 2 weeks ago her mother died, people in AA reallied around her for to give support (her mother is alive I spoke to her yesterday) I talked to her nurse about a concern with her unborn child'd health (not pregnant) doesn't work where she said she worked or live where she said she lived.
My point in sharing some details is that these are very serious claims/stories/tragedies.
I watched my fellow AA's reach out be compassionate and non-judgemental ( Responsibility Pledge- I want the hand of AA to always be there) with this newcomer of @ 5 months.
She is where she should be at the hospital getting care but they didn't have the truth either.
My dilemma is as her sponsor what is my role now.  She is very ill-no doubt -some are sicker than others.  Is she seriously mentally ill? Delusional- Schizophrenic or a pathological liar?  I do need to keep myself safe in a variety of ways.
A lot of my recovery work has been around reclaiming my REALITY!  I do not want to be drawn into her illusions/dellusions or lies.
I don't know if she is conscious in her tales or not.  More will be revealed as there is a funeral that people in AA will be going to, to give support to her later today and there is not a body in a casket to mourn.  How do I know this?  I talked to where the service was to be held- no service there.  Then called her dad- and got a shock, even though I already knew her mother would be alive, I called to check out my reality.  Her mother answered the phone.
I do not have info yet on what she suffers from and I have empathy and compassion for her.  This I know because I would not change anything I did for her.
What I would like feedback on is when these things happen with sponsees what have you done?
In need of some gentle support,
Kariemac

Tags: Sponsership Self Care Boundaries Higher Power

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What a week!
I have been sick with a viral thing- cold & ache flu like symptoms and tired- oh man.
I was in court this week with my ex-husband who I continue to pray for almost daily-lately-like my sponser told me to by the way.
I was so fearful- not of the court system but what he might do.  I was with this man for 22 years of my life and was constantly put in line- if you know what I mean..... emotionally, physically, sexually, spiritually and verbally.  Never again.  I continue to keep my power because I took it back and I am keeping it close to me.  But not to close to shut others out.  That day in court went very well actually as well as it could have gone, Thanks be to God and the power of prayer!!
I had a small group of friends in recovery over to my home last night to give comfort and support to one of my sponcees leaving for treatment this morning.  We had fun we watched 28 Days and laughed, gotta love how Sandra Bullock staggers.
Today that sponcee calls me says she has returned because her mother died this morning-   Oh my God.
What did she do?  She went to a AA meeting and wanted to go with me to another one tonight. That's wanting recovery bad- that's doing all the do things that's changing your life- and taking life on life's terms.
She was thanking God for all the supports she received today not blaming God.  Thanks for today I learned that I so want to appreciate people in my life and tell them I love them today and not tomorrow.  We may not have tomorrow together.
Do your self and someone else a favour-give them a HUG and tell them you love them!!!!

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Well here I am- do I fit in???
I have  never blogged before.
Wow another first.  In recovery I have had many firsts.
I remember when I was first introduced to the idea that I was abusing alcohol.  I was at a recovery group for codependancy that did work through psychodrama.  I thought that those blasted%^$%#@# alcholics were NOT allowed in that group.     'They ' were the root of all evil.  I had no idea that I was one of two participants that were not already in 12 step programs and the facilitator of the group was an alcoholic in recovery. 
Thank GOD  because I would not have stayed there I was so angry at my childhood circumstances because of an active alcoholic who's choices affected by young life greatly.  
I learned so much about my self in that group of drunks and addicts during those years. Today I am forever gratiful for the opportunities that were given to me through that recovery group.  Sometimes great opportunities come in very challenging packages!!
I am able to have gratitude just for today as an alcholic in active recovery.  One day at a time...of course!   

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