Dear Schis,

    I think the reason many of us find it harder to break away from bad relationships than it is to break free from drugs and alcohol is because like you said. Even though we think we hear certain drugs or alcohols calling our name, if we can busy our minds for 20 minutes or so, many times those thoughts will drift away. People don't drift away. They call you, text you, show up at your job, on your doorstep late at night begging for just ONE MORE CHANCE! Sentimentality doesn't seem to play a role in our addictions as far as the above aforementioned, but it certainly does in our relationships with other human beings.

    The biggest problem I have seen in co-dependency, is that you really put up with much more manure then you would in a healthy relationship. And pray, I mean pray that the person that your co-dependant on is not also a recovering addict, because if they fall, many times you will follow. That is why we suggest no relationships for 1 year, and if your in one, you need to figure out something. It takes very, very special people to both get clean at the same time.

   Schis, that you have shed that old skin, it might be a good thing to concentrate on you for a while. Yes, us humans are relational beings, but you'd be suprised at how much you learn about yourself when you don't have someone else you need to entertain, be there for, or whatever else takes time from you and recovery. Keep God right out front and learn to fall in love with Him with all your heart, mind, soul and strength. I am truly in love with my wife and children, but my higher power still comes first.

            &nb sp;                         &nb sp;       Oldschool777