Hi there....had a question that i probably don't want to hear the answer to but i think i need to hear it anyway........I can count in the last two years approximately the last seven or ten times I have been drunk.  I do not drink every day or even most days.  Bu when i do, it is with the intention to head into oblivion and numbnes.  I never even considered that I had a drinking problem until I did my fifth step in another fellowship and realized that for a great many of the wrongs I had listed I was also drunk. Also I dont drink often...since Christmas i would say once or twice........but the last time I had gallons of beer and for the first time woke up wanting a drink.  I think my primary drug of choice is sugar, flour and quantity of food.  But the thought that I could have a drinking problem is absolutely humiiating to me.  I was just wondering if anyone has had a similar experience or if I can monitor this by adding alcohol to my food abstinance and work my other program.  Seems like the more food I get out of my life, the more drink i crave............thanks for any shares

When I drank at first it was to 'Be a part of' a social group- later on I drank to get loose enough to dance, I drank to sleep- you get the idea! 

For me it wasn't when or where, it was escape, join in, be comfortable in my skin-

Then at the end I had black outs, and finaly alcohol didn't have the 'desired effect' at all.... They told me when I came around 'it wasn't how much I drank

but what alcohol did to me.'  I've known binge drinkers who had the same

 progression as I, just in a slightly different time frame- Blessings, Nia

Thanks for sharing.  i am having a really hard time coming to terms with this part of my life.

I was afraid to go out of my house tonight because i wanted to drink so badly and I was afraid that once I started  I would not stop. I do not like having to admit that. I woke up this morning and wanted to drink and that has NEVER happened to me before this week.

I am kind of falling apart right now, not sure what to do....I cannot honestly say step one and accept that. Because it is not normally like this for me. normally it is the food.

But the only thing that stops me from drinkng is that I have no money coming in at the moment and I am working my other program and I kinda have to stay and deal. And life is jsut a big ball of pain right now.  ANd the admission that I could get that drunk to get rid of the pain is causing me a lot of shame

Thanks for sharing your story.

I dont feel as alone, because I saw myself there

     Nia and Serenity Angel got it in a nushell. It isn't that we drink - it's the damage we do when we drink and the fact that we eventually cannot stop...
     But it is a disease and there are treatments for it...
Dennis

I know you, you are like me!

You've got some great answers from solid people. Love your comment about the mornings at the end of your post. My experience taught me that this disease is progressive. Keep up the research and it will get worse. You have a choice!

luv

Keith

www.hopeserenity.ca

What's up-

          I found that as soon as I put the drug down, something else came into my life to obsess about.  But I don't have that crutch anymore- I don't have to put something in me to get me outside of myself.

12 step groups are to focus on the poisonous aspects of what we put into ourselves- and why we did- it was apparent that I didn't have the power not to kill myself slowly with drugs.
But if I'm allowing my life to become unmanagable in other areas, food, shopping, sex, I have to have my first step come to life-  What is unmanagable today? what am I experiencing powerlessness on now?

One ain't enough.  I can't have just one of anything.
The damage comes when I have 2 girlfriends.
when I have 2 apartments I can't afford.
when I have 2 jobs I don't have time to commit to.
when I have 2 guitars when I can only play one at a time.
when I have 2 cheeseburgers when I'm dieting.

Honest assessment, what do I need to surrender to today?


In addition to this, some people may not be in the throws of addiction right now.  Some people are normies, 'earthlings', beginning the process of a downfall.  If your here before enormous damage occurs, wonderful.  But 12 step programs are not for everybody.  Its a blessing- 'many are chosen, few will choose'

Add alcohol to that abstinence plan, but remember that abstinence does not equal recovery

Addict called Thom
"human being, not human doing"

Hi there,

Alcoholism is a chronic dependence on alcohol despite negative consequence. From what you have stated it doesn’t appear that you’re alcoholic for now but some of the statements like: “Seems like the more food I get out of my life, the more drink I crave” is certainly of concern.  Take some expert advice and assistance immediately. Good Luck!

Alcohol Abuse