I could not beleive it. 7 years of sobriety down the drain. now, I'm back to square 1.

I was able to rebuild an otherwise drug infested life. I'm blessed to have a great wife, beautiful kids a newborn baby boy, and awesome friends. all I had to do was to stay clean. sadly though, I let my guard down and bam! I fell down hard.

Im happy to find an online support group like this. hopefully this will help me begin the long journey to recovery.

This disease wants you dead!

   You haven't lost the work you have done for recovery-and all any of us have is today !

  Grab on to your program, HP, sponsor and friends in recovery, so you can work your steps- and get active again... make any amends needed-then smile- you have the gift of coming back into the rooms- some never get that chance !  Nia

As long as your breathing, there's still HOPE! Keep hope alive! Good luck to you, and keep us posted!
--Angie Fallowfield (crow73)

Being back at square one is far better than being taken out of the game. None of it is wasted. Take what you know (including the one that got through your guard) and use it like you learned 7 years ago. The road will be shorter...
Take care,
Dennis

Keep coming...we need each other on this journy!

awww!! im sorry your so down... but i seen it in the aa book somehwere... (hey im new at this) but i seen it said in there that as we are not perfect we may have our days where we mess up... in some other wording though.. and just move on from it and start over..... i know that me i look down on my self for one little mistake sometimes... i know you pry say well this is a big one but what i mean is even when i make one mistake sometimes i say" thats it i midse well quit i  f'd it up..". thats what took me so long to get to the point im at now... i would try and mess up and i was my own worst enemy myself by giving up... but now i see that i am human i make mistakes and i have to try to look at all the positive and try to think of the mistake as one little thing in the big picture... to compare it to somethng (i know its a goofy comparision) but my house... if it gets a mess and i feel like oh my god my kids made a mess and its all messed up now i have to start over... i have to look at all the little things like the books are still on the shelf and the computer area is clean and hey most of the clothes are hung there are jsut 6 loads... that need washed compared the the hundred of clothes that are around here for me and my 5 kids... and when i look at it that way i see its not that big of a thing to start workign on it one day at a time and eventually its back in order... its the getting started thats the hardest part of the job...that and the being mad at myself cause I let it get messed up!!but hey its an ongoing process thats why they say houseworks never ends... ! miss

Be proud of those seven years!!! Now get back on the horse (perhaps not the best analogy).
 

Open, Willing, and Honest----you've got all three and that's half the battle....."Well begun, is half done...."  Thanks for encouraging us in our journeys as well....Plus, I really think there's something you can only learn about your "triggers" / temptations, and the like to stay sober 14 years and beyond now, that you could not have learned about yourself without going through this pain and shame.....My journey has shown me that my Higher Power doesn't simply want to put me back together again like I used to be before I used or relapsed...He wants to take all the broken pieces that I give Him now and make a brand new sculpture out of them....He wants to create me into something I could have never been before had I not fallen and been broken......Hard to believe that sometimes as the Spirit is willing but the flesh is weak, but, it's true and millions can attest to that, even as you could for 7 years, and will, for many years to come. Thank God for your supportive family and friends.
How do the sayings go?   "Its not the fall but those who get back up..." and, "The race is not to the swift but to those who keep on running."

Keep running with His Strength,

Peace,

Ken/prodigalreturned

Greetings,
  All I can say is thanks for being honest and seeking support!

  AND since I have a certain penchant of negativity for the NA program being not more helpful on this subject of relapse, I can say also to BE KIND TO YOURSELF. Just as the first person said in this thread, you have not lost that time at all! in fact your ability to be clean will now be stronger than ever before. It just seems to happen this way. 7-years was a good long stretch, and perfection is not all it's cracked up to be. So Be kind to yourself.

  I honestly believe that this subject of kindness would be so well suited to the NA program since many of us have been anything but kind to ourselves via our using. Also, often relapses are a sign of difficult times in the reality of our lives............and since you said a new born baby, well that is some trigger right there for you. OK OK, off my soap box.

  Just know this, you are not alone, and that, the program and all of we are here to support you, love you, and welcome you back "newcomer" or not. One day at a time, and do your best to not think you have lost anything, but that you have gained everything!

  Love and peace to you brother. Enjoy and take good care of yourself and your family. As you yourself said, you are a lucky man to have a partner, and family that understands.

Stonecarver5

Im SO glad you're getting back up and trying again!! :)
There's nothing better than that!!
"If at first you don't succeed, try, try again"!!
Im here for you whenever you may need support!
Here,
its not about how many years, days, or hours you have under your belt,
its about trying and doing your best to get past your addiction, beating your addiction, learning from your mistakes, and moving on with the life God blessed you with!!
I hope everything goes well,
and like I said before,
Im always here!!

-Shay