Howdy all -
No pictures today. The title for this blog was a gift from Keith B. He has the innate ability to ferret things out - like where the hell is the court jester? I was going to tell him I have stopped by the site, answered a few messages - so I've been around, kinda. just not feeling well or some BS. Just blow him off. But the truth is I have been 100% MIA where it counts. No - I didn't go back out, still sober as any one of our ilk can be. But in a way, sober activities have had to take a back seat for a bit. But you cannot blow off friends. Making amends will not be the order of the dayfor this drunk.
Now as Paul Harvey says, the rest of the story:
A short while back I ended up going to the doctor. Had a cold that turned into a lung infection. Making this incredibly boring story short is I was diagnosed with very severe emphysema. Well, now there is a great way to start out the year. Then we find the "standard" medications don't work. On the plus side that means that my prescription medicine bills will stay low.
So I'm currently getting all the ducks in a row to see if I'm a viable candidate for a procedure called Lung Volume Reduction Surgery (LVRS). It's a process by which they go in and take out the bad sections of the lungs so the good parts can expand better (that is, if the disease is not uniformly spread throughout the lungs). God willing, I'll be a shoo-in. I should know something in the next few weeks.
An interesting analogy for those that are interested. LVRS & God is to my emphysema as AA and God was to my drinking. It's only by the grace of God and Alcoholics Anonymous that I am alive and sober today. It is most hopefully that (yet again) by His grace and the skills of the professionals at Cedars-Sinai will I live. You see, this (like my alcoholism) is a 100% self-inflicted wound. Years of smoking. No different that my years of drinking. Yet another progressive and deadly disease caused by a series of bad decisions.
So, I haven't been the best of sorts to be around. This disease had occupied most of my non-working hours, fighting it, understanding it and exploring the options I have available. My wife has been truly amazing and patient with me. My employer has been astoundingly accomodating. Now I ask that you all bear with me for a bit until we get it sorted out.
I have found that if you cannot breath - nothing else matters, even not drinking. But every time I get my breath back,- I find that there is still nothing worth drinking over.
Tis a good thing for this drunk to know and pass on...