GET REAL (with expectations)
Another one of those readings that struck a chord, and reminded me of universal truths in life and recovering an abundant life!
I am a very avid golfer; some have even accused me of being addicted to the sport. Funny, what I really like about golf is the sociability of the game coupled with the natural outdoors setting. At my darkest times, I found more serenity on the golf course than in any other spot on earth.
People assume because you play a lot and are passionate, that you are good at it. For me and golf, this is not the case. I have not mastered the game and at best have achieved a level of competency. My love of the game comes from enjoying it for what it is, knowing realistically my own limitations, and setting reasonable expectations for myself. Pro's look at par on most courses as a score of 72. For me, par is 90 and when I score below that, it is a very good feeling. Like Tiger Woods, I do expect that if I do my best, I will score below par.
The reading:
"Stop expecting too much from yourself.
--Anonymous
When there is too wide a gap between standards we set for ourselves and our actual achievement, unhappiness follows. If we can't improve the performance, we should lower the demands. When we are true to ourselves, we come to expect only that which we are capable of doing. As we grow each day in recovery, we are able to do more.
What we expect from ourselves can change the next day. It is very important that through our meetings and conversations with fellow members, we keep close tabs on our development. We find out that life is for living, and it is better lived when we do our assignments every day.
We are really never given more than we can do. As long as we have realistic goals, we will be given what we need to succeed".
If I worked at golf like it was a day job, I would reduce my expected score expectation. But as stated, sociability and environment remain my key objectives. Of course I like to do the best that I am capable of; I know without constant practise, I place limitations on myself and have to always remember that.
As you contemplate life recovery, or look at strengthening your recovery program, keep this writing in mind. Do the best you can with the effort you put into things. If you want more, increase the practise time and keep expectations in line with effort.
Need some help with this issue? We can be reached through www.hopeserenity.ca. In the meantime, quit beating yourself up. You'll get back in direct proportion to what you put in. There are no shortcuts.
Tags: ICF Certified Life And Addictions Coach
