Hang in their. It semms that the only way i could learn a new way to live was to feel the unconfort. It feels so crazy and strange to start with, but dont give up on yourself ,IT does get better, and i am the IT. And alcoholics were the only friends i needed for awhile,until i could learn to not let the uncomfort rule me and my thoughts. As long as i was with them i was not going to drink,and i needed to be around people who could understand what i was feeling so they could help to work the bad feelings.  Most People who do not understand addictions can not help me because they do not know what i mean when i say i am uncomfortable with who i am. So please stick with your alcoholics and drug addicts until you can be the real person you were meant to be.   Much Hope and love sent you way....Tom.L 

I can identify with the 'sabotage' and chaos- the devil you know is better than the devil ( angel) you don't! I have been around sober for a number of years and

the serenity I know now is soooo worth letting go of the old ways- Like Dennis says

try 90 meetings in 90 days, then keep coming!  Blessings, Nia

Yes indeed living recovery without extreme chaos is so very uncomortable for a while, but today I enjoy my life with out the drama:) It took a lil while to get there, just like everything else in life and recovery does.

God Bless you hun

Jessie

I am a sabotager who loves to rescue others but not myself(learned helplesness).....and I'm attracted to sociopaths!!  I'll be your friend in Californi if you want..  I'm trying to maintain the (healthy) smooth ride, and I'm very uncomfortable too...

jill

DeeJay-

     You might want to try a couple of AA or NA meetings - find sober folk of like mind. Far safer than passing out a phone number...

Take care,

Dennis