addiction.
this word scares the s**t out of me.
but do you want to know what word is even more terrifying?
addict.
because that's what i am.
that's who i am, and it shall forever remain with me.
it's like a black clud hanging over, constantly seperating me from society.
making me stand out, when all i want to do is blend in, be normal.
but what really is normal?
everybody has a secret. something they feel alienates them.
but if everybody has something like that, does that not mean that we all have something in common?
then we all can't be so different, can we?
why is it, then, that us, the addicts, are constantly searching for acceptance b people who have a secret too?
why can't we just be comfortable in our own skin? if somebody looks at s the wrong way, we instantly feel that we are being judged and that we have something to prove.
why why why?
we're human.
just because we are addicts does not mean that we are not human.
god darn it, this is frustrating isnt it?
a constant battle within myself, between wanting to be accpted, and really not giving two shits.
if you, or they, are juding me, why the F**k should i care? you clearly aren't worth my time.
but still, i give you the time of day.
i let you in.
when you just shove me away.
ugh. bullshit.
thats what i think.
those who judge, have no place in my life.
FINAL.
just for today, i will appreciate myself, my addiction, and my recovery without the need for acceptance from any one of you.
Done.
