Simple truth, like millions of us, when the wine comes around, you say simply- no thanks, not tonight. The only one really worrying about it is you! Scary thought. Most others eally don't care. Our own ego does!

Food 4 thought

In our belief any scheme of combating alcoholism which proposes to shield the sick man from temptation is doomed to failure. If the alcoholic tries to shield himself he may succeed for a time, but usually winds up with a bigger explosion than ever. We have tried these methods. These attempts to do the impossible have always failed.

So our rule is not to avoid a place where there is drinking, if we have a legitimate reason for being there. That includes bars, nightclubs, dances, receptions, weddings, even plain ordinary whoopee parties. To a person who has had experience with an alcoholic, this may seem like tempting Providence, but it isn’t.

You will note that we made and important qualification. Therefore, ask yourself on each occasion, “Have I any good social, business, or personal reason for going to this place? Or am I expecting to steal a little vicarious pleasure from the atmosphere of such places?” If you answer these questions satisfactorily, you need have no apprehension. Go or stay away, whichever seems best. But be sure you are on solid spiritual ground before you start and that your motive in going is thoroughly good. do not think of what you will get out of the occasion. Think of what you can bring to it. But if you are shaky, you had better work with another alcoholic instead! (BIG BOOK pg 100.101]

I use soda water and lemon, soda water and OJ, when I'm out and about in the social melieu- occasionally iced tea- or plain water. The beauty of the first two is 'they could be a mixed drink- but they aren't. And nobody needs to know differently.

on the rare occasion a person asks - I just keep my answer basic and simple. " No

thanks" if they push  I try to keep it to " I don't want to drink anything else right now"

You really don't owe anyone an explanation-  Blessings, Nia

Dusty -

     People don't like change. If you were doing those other things you spoke of, the people that you associated with would also do these things. And wonder what was up, why you're not huffing, shooting or whatnot.

     Most, if not all of then have no idea what an alcoholic is - even if they happen to be one. To them it would be no problem to tie one on - then not have a drink for weeks or more. Or put down that partially finished glass of wine (because they were beginning to feel it) and walk away from it. I have never figured that one out.

     They see a change in you, they want to know why. My friends and coworkers are aware I'm an alcoholic. It comes up at times in coversations - but with a different slant. The questions tend towards how it works, or they have a friend they are worried about.

     As far as a party - a glass of ice and ginger ale goes a long way. If I get uncomfortable, I leave. If someone asks, I say "no thanks, not today".

YF,

Dennis