Going to the doctor on Tuesday I haven’t been eating or sleeping, crying all day, lost 15 pounds in a week ... with the divorce and sobriety I’m just sick. I miss my married life so much. Sorry for the pitty party. I haven't even been to meeting just sitting home friend come over and I really just want them gone. Feeling like s**t really. Stop working on my four steps, it makes me more depressed. I don’t want to talk to anyone. I know there are others that are worse off than me. Hoping that the doctor would just put me out of my misery like a wounded animal. Done all of healing classes, self help, it's all a bunch of Bull sh*t but blah blah blah once again. knowing time will heal and god, I say Bull Sh*t. Death seems to be the only way out of this hurt!!!! I know it is because of Depression, and I know things will get better. But that’s all Bull sh*t it. I have no desire to do get high, depression is my high now, bull sh*t God help ME. I ask everyone to say a pray for me. Help
