Nola
You posted this yesterday and I truly hope that today you were able to see a difference in the way of your thinking.
You see when a person changes their thoughts they will feel differently.
Yes I know it sounds to easy but it is hard- and yes it works with practise.  Our disease is in our thinking so to change our thinking is a huge undertaking!
Suggestion: Try a God box if you like- put all your worries/care/fears/resentments/dis-eases down on paper and hand them over to God in the box. 
Now let go and let God handles what you wrote.  I do this when things seem too heavy to carry- and I have asked- made wishes to my HP and some have come true.
The key of willingness I hand to you my friend, please grab it!!
Karie

It's okay, I don't really know you either But I will most definitely pray for you Nola, right now infact. Your Higher Power knows what you need and I believe that you will get it, all you gotta do is hang on!!!! By a string, a thread, whatever! How many times have i hung on by a string or a thread and then My Creator steps in right on time. Not my time unfortunately, but poo on my time and my will anyway because i have no idea what's best for me most of the time!
God Bless
-Jessie

Nola -
   May the One you follow hold you and your son close and give you strength to do His will....
YFIR,
Dennis

Prayers your way! Take it easy and remember, it is only one day at a time.

You have my prayers and any experience I can share with you that will help! Feel free to contact me anytime!

luv

Will say a prayer for you to get some relief. I still have times that all I can do is get through one minute at a time.
have hope & seek freedom..............shannon

Keep at It

Keep practicing your recovery behaviors, even when they feel awkward, even when they haven't quite taken yet, even if you don't get it yet.

Sometimes it takes years for a recovery concept to move from our mind into our heart and soul. We need to work at recovery behaviors with the diligence, effort, and repeated practice we applied to codependent behaviors. We need to force ourselves to do things even when they don't feel natural. We need to tell ourselves we care about ourselves and can take care of ourselves even when we don't believe what we're saying.

We need to do it, and do it, and do it - day after day, year after year.

It is unreasonable to expect this new way of life to sink in overnight. We may have to "act as if" for months, years, before recovery behaviors become ingrained and natural.

Even after years, we may find ourselves, in times of stress or duress, reverting to old ways of thinking, feeling, and behaving.

We may have layers of feelings we aren't ready to acknowledge until years into our recovery. That's okay! When it's time, we will.

Do not give up! It takes time to get self-love into the core of us. It takes repeated practice. Time and experience. Lessons, lessons, and more lessons.

Then, just when we think we've arrived, we find we have more to learn.

That's the joy of recovery. We get to keep learning and growing all of our life!

Keep on taking care of yourself, no matter what. Keep on plugging away at recovery behaviors, one day at a time. Keep on loving yourself, even when it doesn't feel natural. Act as if for as long as necessary, even if that time period feels longer than necessary.

One day, it will happen. You will wake up, and find that what you've been struggling with and working so hard at and forcing yourself to do, finally feels comfortable. It has hit our soul.

Then, you go on to learn something new and better.

Today, I will plug away at my recovery behaviors, even if they don't feel natural. I will force myself to go through the motions even if that feels awkward. I will work at loving myself until I really do.

From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation. All rights reserved. No portion of this publication may be reproduced in any manner without the written permission of the publisher.

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