Well, it's been 1 year since I mentally broke free from the emotionally abusive relationship I had with my ex-boyfriend. I told him one evening in early August to take his checkbook and go to #$%!@. I knew then, it was time. I had to make a change. I began searching for a new place to live that was closer to my work and getting paperwork in line to sell some property to my ex-boyfriend that I foolishly purchased half with him in 2002. I didn't want to sell, but it was the only way of getting out and starting over. 12 year relationship down the tubes. Worse of it is, I should have left sooner, about 3 or 4 years, as my best friend would say. She was right. During the relationship is when I began drinking every day. I remember exactly how it started. In the beginning, he worked 2nd shift, while I worked 1st shift. I didn't drink during the week. Only a few beers on Friday/Saturday nights. NICE. But, when he went on 1st shift, that's when things started going down hill. He would drink beer every evening while we worked around the house; and that's all we ever did was work around the house. All work and no play, every day. Next thing I knew, I was drinking every evening too. You know, do what he's does and likes, things will get better. WRONG! Needlesstosay, it didn't get better, but worse. But this time, I was drinking heavily every day. I even found out after I decided to leave him that he was cheating on me. That was the last painful straw. That just about broke me.
My 1 year of moving into my new place is not here yet; but close. I moved into my new place on Sept 27 2007. A new beginning; a new life. My best friend has forbade me to date for 1 year..ha! ha!. But..I agree. This past year, I have worked on "me"; finding out who "me" is and what "me" wants and likes to do. I've done too much for everyone else for too many years. It's my turn.
My first big test of strength is coming up tomorrow evening. I'm planning on going to a singles dance at an Elks Club. Lots of alcohol around. I already know to order a club soda with lime or lemon. Don't know what it tastes like, but I'm about to find out. If it gets too tempting, I'll leave. Please keep me in your prayers to give me the strength I need.
God...
Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. --Amen
Have a wonderful evening!
Sharon
