There has been something going on in my head for a few days that is taking away from serenity. I am fairly sure, after meditation, that I know what it is.
On my journey, and not far into it, I had to clear up my “wreckage from the past” to move forward. I took a very in depth examination of what had happened, and funny enough, found a day when I was between three and four years old, that changed my life forever.
From that day forward, nothing was ever the same and I began a series of behaviors that were not healthy and hurt myself and others. There was a huge benefit in the sharing of the past with my higher power and another person. I did not live the past, but accepted what happened and understood who I had become and why.
STEP FIVE: Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs
"This practice of admitting one’s defects to another person is, of course, very ancient. It has been validated in every century, and it characterizes the lives of all spiritually centered and truly religious people. But today religion is by no means the sole advocate of this saving principle. Psychiatrists and psychologists point out the deep need every human being has for practical insight and knowledge of his own personality flaws and for a discussion of them with an understanding and trustworthy person. So far as alcoholics are concerned, AA. would go even further. Most of us would declare that without a fearless admission of our defects to another human being we could not stay sober. It seems plain that the grace of God will not enter to expel our destructive obsessions until we are willing to try this."
I am a great believer that the truths contained in the 12 steps are a great model for good mental hygiene for every human being, and are a fabulous spiritual platform for life for all. I incorporate them as a foundation in the transformational life coaching practise I operate, and must remember to practice them myself
For me to enjoy a large measure of serenity on a daily basis, I must share issues with someone I trust and who can help me find the answers that are within. As we all know, sometimes you can’t see the forest for the trees. I also know my higher power has placed people in my life who help!
As I meditated this morning, the issue became clear. There is an answer, but I am not seeing it for whatever reason. I am fortunate to have people in my life who I do trust and who have expertise.
While the issue on the surface is not a “defect” of character, it relates back to one that I have, and that is pride. There are times I am reluctant to ask for help and share honestly on certain topics, finance being one of them.
I thank my higher power for making the path clear as to what to do, and today I will make arrangements to talk things out with one of my trusted confidants! I cannot afford to accumulate wreckage on the journey. The work in clearing up the past was not easy, and to be in a good state of mind, I must continue good mental and spiritual practices!
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Nia
