Im finding it really hard to move on without my boyfriend.I feel really guilty about yesterday.Still hate myself.Just had a huge fight with his mom.She says i must make good on my promises that when im clean he can move back in with me,into my new apartment,that our lives will continue as they were...that it is apparently my responsibility to get him clean and to help him.It is my responsibility(as the clean one) to make us a home,get us a new car(he wrote his and mine off while driving high!)no insurance and no sorry.That im such a bad person for not living up to all this,for questioning his love for me.If you read my bulletin you will understand what im talking about.I just feel angry that its all on my shoulders and if I dont "make good" then im the bad,horrible b**ch.She put me on a huge guilt trip but im questioning why i should do anything for someone who uses me and disrespects me so much.Im the proverbial contradiction as I love him so much that I will and have done anything for him.What now.She knows exactly what buttons to press.S**T
Its a long long story so anyone who has the time to hear my self-pity let me know and il msg my story to you.
Twinkie
