I've recently returned to my mothers house, for the minute. Back to the most codependent relationship I have. She's obviously glad to have me back, and sometimes it makes me feel bad how kind she's being to me, while I become my usual robotic self around her.
She got a boyfriend while I was away, and all I've really heard about him is her complaints. She has invited him over for supper tonight, and assumed I would be joining them. The truth is, I don't want to meet her boyfriend. I want her to have a separate life from me. I don't want to hear her stories (which are always disrespectful of whoever she is with), or hear her complaints. I just want to have a mother that can let go of her kid. I don't need her to do my laundry, or clean up after me, or make me things to eat.
In this way, I feel selfish. She really has been overly kind to me, and I know she's just happy to have me back. But I have to draw boundaries, and if they are not defined correctly, I will find out and readjust them. I can really only learn by trial and error.
