Well my Son has now been deposited back to University again only this time I don't have my best friend at the bottom of a bottle to help me through. Trying to keep as busy as I can & I do have loads to do this week. The trouble is I can't sleep at nights, my mind is running riot this week with trying to make sure everything is sorted for when I go into to hospital on Monday. Trying to make sure bills are paid in advance & my animals will be cared for whilst away. Never had to worry about my bills before when I was working as they just came out of my salary & what ever was left over, which was a lot, I spent on my home, son & myself. Now I find myself being careful how often I use my dishwasher, when I can use lights & if I afford to turn on my central heating when it starts to get cold & will I even have a house to heat in the immediate future. One thing I have learned is that these are only things, at least I have my life, my Son (even if he's not around at the moment) my friends, family & my animals & I'M SOBER.
Why can't I sleep? Everything is so much better after a good night's rest. Oh well, at least I'll be in the right place on Monday if I'm exhausted!!
I feel as though I'm just going through the motions & I wonder if I will survive. I don't believe that I've actually started crying, very unusual for me.
Ah, my dog Busta has just licked away some tears which has made me chuckle. Life is sweet.
:)
Tags: Tired
