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Tag: humor
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Two little boys, ages 8 and 10, were excessively mischievous. They were always getting into trouble and their parents knew all about it. If any mischief occurred in their town, the two boys were probably involved. The boys' mother heard that a preacher in town had been successful in disciplining children, so she asked if he would speak with her boys. The preacher agreed, but he asked to see them individually. So the mother sent the 8 year old first,... Read More
50 Reasons to Smile 1. Falling in love. 2. Praying 3. A hot shower. 4. No lines at the supermarket 5. A special glance. 6. Getting mail 7. Exercising 8. Hearing your favourite song on the radio. 9. Lying in bed listening to the rain outside. 10. Barbecue Time 11. Finding the sweater you want is on sale for half price. 12. Chocolate milkshake. (or vanilla) (or strawberry) 13. A long distance phone call. 14. Morning coffee 15... Read More
Two Rabbis and a priest go fishing. When the three are out on the water, one Rabbi says, "Oops, I left the cooler in the trunk, I'd better go get it or we won't be able to eat or drink." The rabbi proceeds to jump out of the boat and hop across the water. A few minutes later, he comes hopping back across the lake with the cooler. The priest sees this and shakes his head in disbelief. He thinks to himself "Theres only one person I know who can do that and I doubt he's a Rabbi." A couple o... Read More
You start out each morning with a 30-minute jog around the bathroom. You write to your mother in Germany every week, even though she sends you mail from Iowa asking why you never write. You wear your boxers on your head because you heard it will ward of evil dandruff spirits. You’re always having to apologize to your next door neighbour for setting fire to his lawn decorations. Every commercial you hear on the radio reminds you of death. People stay away from you whenever they hear you h... Read More
1. You - Off my planet. 2. Not the brightest crayon in the box now, are we? 3. Well, this day was a total waste of makeup. 4. Errors have been made. Others will be blamed. 5. And your crybaby whiny-assed opinion would be...? 6. I'm not crazy, I've just been in a very bad mood for 30 years. 7. Allow me to introduce my selves. 8. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer. 9. Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed. 10. I'm just working here until a good fast... Read More
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