my body is a canvas, not a drum
User Type: Standard
music is the air i breathe
and i could never cage it in
to be one genre that fills
my lungs and my ears.
i'm an aspiring fiction writer,
and i am awesome at it =]
ACROSS THE UNIVERSE
anything that effects me emotionally or artistically
i'm a big laugher =]
you can call me andie.
i am a crystallized rainbow,
there are many different colors
and sides to my personality;
but when the light hits me just right,
all of those different sides and colors
split into a million other colors and sides.
but when you look at me as is,
there is just one simply plain white girl
who stands before you wishing she was a rainbow.
maybe one day she will see it too.
i'm trying to recover from an eating disorder mainly.
while attempting this in the past i seem to trade one addiction for another.
i don't want to do that this time.
alcoholism and drug addiction run very strongly in both sides of my family;
i fear i am on the tipping edge of becoming an alcoholic,
tho the fear is not enough to force me to stop partying on the weekends,
and drinking to "better" my writing...
which also leads me further to believe i am headed in that direction.
i used to self harm quite often, but have recently stopped unless hysterically upset.
i now self harm in much more discrete ways such as using my eating disorder,
freezing myself, or forcing myself to endure anything else i find "uncomfortable".
i also suffer from depression, ocd, panic attacks, and a h*ll? of a lot of anxiety.
and i love Jesus.
i don't even remember not being a Christian.
i remember accepting Christ when i was a child,
and nothing much before that.
the medical field
genuine people with a lot of heart
"Christians" who judge from their high horse and misunderstand the Bible's message that God is the only one who can judge and that we are ALL sinners, not just the gays and other religions... urgh! that just irks me to the core. Jesus teaches LOVE not HATE and criticism.